She left me speechless

I keep spare umbrellas in my car. I collect them at work and ask for them at other medical offices. Personally I’ve never lost an umbrella. I’m OCD and always know exactly where my “things” are. I keep the umbrellas and hand them out when it rains to people at bus stops. I don’t ride the bus. I have two cars and a motorcycle but I can imagine how getting wet just wanting to go to and from work sucks. When I pull over and offer an umbrella 99% of the time they are happy and appreciative. Honestly it pisses me off my city doesn’t have covered stops at all stops. Some stops don’t even have a paved area to stand so if it rains your shoes get dirty.

I don’t ride the bus but I can relate to the hassles of people who do. I attend city council meetings to speak about these issues. I’m a citizen here and the best way to be a community is to care for all citizens.

Yesterday I had a patient who I’ve treated for 3 years. She was wearing a sticker that she voted. I commented that I hoped more people turned out to vote this midterm. I expected her to say she agreed. Except she didn’t. What she said was how she voted because she wanted more Republicans and was worried “we” may lose our sway if she didn’t vote. She continued and added,

“I watched the Kavanaugh hearings but honestly I don’t care if he assaulted her or not. We need more conservatives on the bench.”

As a medical professional I had lots of little conversations with myself about providing care and the level of care I HAD to provide. As a woman who has been assaulted I tried to not cry at the gross rationalization.

I’m a white woman who has a pretty affluent life. There have been times I have misunderstood things and needed someone to explain something to me. Example was a few years ago I was up in arms about a running group called Black Girls Run. I explained to a black friend how it was racist. If I had a group called White Girls Run people would be livid. He pointed out white women run. That the Black Girls Run group is a movement to get black women active. That made sense and suddenly I liked the shirts and moved past my initial response. I was educated.

Yesterday my patient left me speechless. Not only did I feel like my victimization didn’t matter but that if it served a greater cause for someone else then I should just happily accept my rape. Make America Great Again and all.

Whatever our beliefs are one thing we should all be able to agree upon is being human. For fucks sake that should come naturally. If it doesn’t maybe watch, ask, and learn.

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