How I am like your cat but better

When your cat is hungry they annoy the piss out of you until you cave.
I go from fine to hungry in 30 seconds and have been known to have a toddler level tantrum if I’m not fed.

Your cat doesn’t like where you put ________ so they give you a look and you know the look and say, “Don’t do it!” They knock it off anyway.
When I’m told not to do something the look is pretty similar and there is a 99% chance I’m going to do it.

You are working and the cat wants attention. Cat jumps on your desk, steps all over the keyboard and sticks their ass in your face.
It’s not beneath me to stick my ass in your face if I want attention.

Your cat has a thorough grooming habit that includes licking their own genitals.
I have a skincare routine that would require a spreadsheet for the uninitiated but I can’t reach my genitals with my tongue. I’ve tried For science.

When you pet a cat and it’s appreciated they purr.
When you pet me and I’m happy I purr.

Your cat doesn’t like you watching when they use their litter box.
As far as you are concerned I don’t have bodily functions. Go away.

You have 30 minutes till the alarm goes off and the cat decides sitting on top of your head choking you with their fur is an excellent way to wake.
You have 30 minutes till the alarm goes off and you wake with my mouth around your cock.

Told you I’m better than a cat.

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